The world is full of what I call the “walking wounded”.
For whatever reasons, and everyone has their own story, we are an unhappy race, us humans, full of fears and anxieties, nervous butterflies, shattered expectations, levels of anger and abuse, and so on and so forth.
But that can stop right now with the practice of Integrated Emotional Intelligence.
With Emotional Intelligence we understand that there is a system we can follow that will lead us from being controlled by our emotions to being in control of ourselves, despite our emotions.
With Conscious Living we understand that we can find a safe quiet place inside of ourselves, a portable place, a moveable, transportable, always available oasis of tranquillity we can travel to instantly no matter what, no matter when.
And, that the split second journey to this place, every time we take it, strengthens our ability to follow the steps that Emotional Intelligence outlines.
With Conscious Living we can be in the present moment all the time, and with the strengthening of that part of the brain that allows new neural pathways in the brain to be activated, we can sidestep our old sad stories, by training our attention.
We strengthen our attention through Conscious Living practice, so we can stop it flying off in any direction it wishes.
And with Targeted Daydreaming we can create our new realities. First, we create material to feed into the loop mechanism in our brain (that ultimately is there to help us find solutions), thus replacing the negative thoughts that have us captive all the time.
And secondly, we begin, via our thoughts, to create our new realities.
Instead of constantly living the fact that we hate our jobs, for example, we can stop at least thinking about how much we hate our jobs and start imagining what would be a nice comfortable fun work environment to be in. Instead of remembering and repeating the nasty things our sociopath boss says and does, in our minds we can envision ourselves being in a job with a great boss who is just the way we would want. Or even being the boss ourselves.
There is no end to imagination. There are no barriers to imagination.
There are no barriers to our imagination except for the ones we put up ourselves.
It could be that your life is in such a depressed situation that you realize that you haven’t daydreamed in years.
I know because I was in that situation once. I suddenly realized I had had no fun, pleasant, waking dreams in years.
The key is to take something small and easy to imagine, that makes you happy, and to start with that.
If you start with something more complicated, you may not get very far, because the voice inside your head will be telling you how and why it’s not logical, not doable, not financially viable.
I am not suggesting to only imagine something that is eminently practical and accessible. No, you can imagine anything, but start with something that will allow you to imagine it.
I know that for myself at the start this was very difficult. No matter what I wanted to imagine, I would always stop myself by asking myself, ok, but how did you get to this place? etc etc
So, for example, if you can’t imagine that great villa you want because you can’t imagine how you would pay for it, or move there, or how many rooms it should have, at least try and imagine the front door, or your bedroom, or a bathroom, or swimming in the pool. or start looking at ads for that kind of home, so you can base your imagination on something.
It gets easier.
I am not advocating sitting still and doing nothing and imagining a fine villa and expecting it to just show up somehow. But everything in life begins in the world of thought before it manifests in the world of action, and all conscious action begins in thought.
So, with Emotional Intelligence we learn to know ourselves enough to understand what our real beliefs are, and what are the paradigms that we have swallowed.
With Conscious Living we learn to stop the voices in our heads, to pay attention to our breath in order to have a way to center ourselves, and to strengthen our capacity for paying attention to what we really want to pay attention to.
And, with Targeted Daydreaming, we begin to redesign our realities. We escape from the humdrum and pain of our existences into places full of colour and light that we design for ourselves. This is not only a short term way to feel better, it is also laying the foundations for upward mobility in our lives.
Okay, so maybe at first you can’t see the colour or the light, but just begin with the first idea, the first image, that is something positive and unrelated to the drabness you have been used to. At first, this means developing a happier attitude as our default thoughts can now become whatever we want, instead of a re-churned list of our unhappiness and disappointments.
Any action begins with a thought.
If you want to open a lock, first you have to want to, then you have remember to take the key out (or find it, which for many is often a moment of panic), hold it in your hand, put it into the lock, and turn it.
If we do not take these simple steps, we will not be able to open the locked door.
Follow my Integrated Emotional Intelligence e-books to delve more deeply into these concepts and create the you, the relationships, and the life of your dreams; or even that which you had always thought to be far beyond your wildest hopes.